The Naysayers Don’t Matter

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You have dreams and burning passions inside you. They are yours. They are in you for a reason and are meant to be chased after.
   You don’t have to defend your dream, just go make it a reality. You were born for this.
   And the naysayers? They are just jealous.

Do What You Say

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There is a lack that needs to be addressed and resolved. It’s the lack of follow through. I think most of us could agree on what types of things are right or wrong and at least have an understanding of what values are. At least in theory.

It’s time to stop saying things with only our words. It’s time we back up our arguments, our beliefs, and our statements with actions that are even bolder.

It can be easy to talk a big game from the safety of social media. There is no one staring you in the face, no friends around to influence you otherwise, no pretense to keep up.

But it is another matter when you are with your family or friends and something happens that tests your beliefs. You don’t really want to stand up for the things you truly believe, it would be easier to just go along with them, or to say nothing at all, the safe way out.

But we need to rise up. We need to go boldly forward with not words, but with actions. Living out our beliefs so that they can be seen.

You probably wouldn’t believe a teacher who was trying to make you believe a subject and he didn’t believe it himself.

So why would others believe us if we aren’t living out that belief?

Start showing and quit talking.

Stop Listening

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Stop listening. That’s right. Stop listening to the doubters, the haters, the naysayers. Stop listening to society who says it’s okay to cheat. Its’ okay to lie. It’s okay to not take care of your body. It’s okay to not discipline your children. It’s okay to look at other women, okay to ignore real world problems. Okay to not step in when you see something wrong. Okay to look the other way.
Stop listening to all these lies, because they are nothing more than that. They are lies, and dangerous ones at that. Start listening to your gut, not what others are trying to shove down your throat. We all know what is truly right, and what is wrong. But that gray area in between seems to get larger and larger, until we no longer even see the right or wrong.
Stop listening to white lies and take charge. Take ownership of your life and the actions you choose and stop letting what is popular or what society deems as satisfactory rule your life, and step up and stop listening.

It’s At Your Fingertips

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Literally the world is truly at your fingertips. We have so much opportunity in this world if we are willing to work hard for it. We can do anything we set our minds to .  We have the capability to learn whatever it is that we want to learn.

Is there that person you haven’t mustered up the courage to talk to?  Call them.  Why not?  Do you want to wonder ‘what if’ forever?

What about that country you’ve always wanted to go to?  Why not?  Get your passport, save some money and go.

Wondering if you could ever get your dream job?  Start finding out what it takes, and don’t stop at no.

Don’t lay down and give up the fight ever.  It’s at your fingertips.

Have you wanted to start that business?  Get a business plan together and go for it.

All great things take risk, they take chances, and they guts.  But you have all the necessary tools.  So go for it and take the plunge.  The world awaits.

You Shouldn’t

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It’s really easy to judge. Really easy. I do it way too much. I’m very opionated so that comes out with thinking other people’s ways of doing things are less than my own sometimes. This theory is very flawed, and judging can lead down a very dark road. If you think about it, bullying is just severe judgement that has gotten so far that it comes out in hateful ways.

Judging is something that causes us to look down on other people. None of us have the right nor the authority to look down on anyone. Looking down on others causes us to begin to lose compassion for other people. We lose the ability to see the situation they are in, we lose the ability to empathize with them, and soon when we do that enough we become desensitized to the feelings of others.

This desensitization leads to us no longer caring what we say or think about another individual.

Another form of judging comes through comparison. Normally if we do something wrong we compare it with what someone else has done and we make ourselves feel better by telling ourselves what we did is not as bad as what someone else did. This quickly leads to judgement because again, all we are doing in this is saying we are better than someone else to make ourselves feel better.

So the next time you feel like judging, think about the slippery slope it leads down and steer clear of it. Replace judgement with a sense of compassion and ask yourself how you can relate to the person more rather than judge them.

Together For Better

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Faithful….what does that word evoke? Does it make you think of someone who is religious? A devoted family member, parent, or spouse? Does it make you think of a trusted employee or boss?

I question a lot whether this word means anything anymore. It is disheartening to see all the unfaithfulness in the world. Particularly in relationships. Media has done an amazing job at creating a fantasy of what relationships look like. When people get into a real relationship they expect everything to go perfect, when it doesn’t they often feel they have the right to “look” elsewhere. This can come in the form of a full blown affair. Giving though to the idea of an affair, addictions to porn or romance novels, or to putting up walls and just being cold towards one another.

Relationships will try you. There is no doubt about it. It can often be the hardest thing you’ve ever faced….but at the same hand it is also the greatest, most wonderful thing that will ever happen to you.

Life is flawed, as such, people are flawed, when you bring two people together those flaws often clash and cause arguments. It’s not the end of the world. It simply takes being faithful and committed and working through whatever issues are present.

There is a reason that marriages are done with an oath in front of witnesses. That reason is because yes marriage is very hard, and there can be times when you question whether you made the right decision. Those oaths are for those challenging times to remind you that “for better or worse”. It doesn’t just say “for better”.

That being said when you are committed and faithful to your marriage and give it the priority it deserves, marriage can be amazing. The trust you build when you are both fully committed and engaged is unlike any other bond in this world. It is the only bond like it. That ability to be so close to not only your spouse, but to your best friend is worth more than anything.

Faithful….it takes being committed. Committed to excellence, committed to putting your spouse first, above what you want. Committed to staying faithful, not just physically, but mentally, and emotionally. Many think it’s okay to look at other men and women while you are married, many think it’s okay to lust after other guys or girls. Or to look at inappropriate images whether it be on computer, a TV screen, or whether it be words on a page. But I assure it’s not. Every one of those things is like playing with fire and is extremely dangerous to a marriage and can often burn it to the ground.

Stay committed, stay faithful. Nothing is more fulfilling when you do this. And it’s never too late to start.

Listening

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This saying above fits a problem that I struggle with sometimes. There are times when I find myself in a conversation not truly listening to understand, but listening either.

A. to come up with a solution

or

B. I’m thinking of my response before the other person finishes.

Both of these habits are destructive to good communication.  They take the focus off the speaker and move it to ourselves.

Knowing this and practicing it however are two totally different things.  To truly understand it we really have to embrace empathy, which is us striving to really understand where the other person is coming from. Putting ourselves in their shoes.

It’s not a matter of me coming up with a solution, it’s not a matter of my opinion, it’s a matter of caring enough about the other person to just let them talk and have someone who genuinely wants to listen and care for them.

Be True

 

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Have you ever felt like you have to prove yourself to someone else.  You feel as if they are controlling your life more than you are. Like they have some kind of say as to what is good enough and what isn’t?

Allowing others to control our decisions and actions can be very dangerous because in the process we lose ourselves. We lose our character, and what makes us unique.

Stay original, stay true to who you are.  We can take others viewpoints, and see if there is anything we can learn from it ,but we shouldn’t just take what others say at face value without questioning their motives or whether or not they are looking out for you or themselves.

Those who truly care about you will encourage you in your pursuits, and they will ask questions that make you think rather than degrade what you are doing.

So examine those around you and cut ties with friends who may try to bring you down.

Stay true to you.

Make It Count

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Every day matters. Every minute matters. I know this is a hard concept to grasp.  It is for me I know.

But every minute does matter. Now I know we have responsibilities and things we have to do. We have to provide for our families, get our education and so forth.

But our attitude and our actions can all either propel us towards making a difference or it can keep us stuck.

We have to see what difference we can make in our every day life.  How can you impact your family?  How can you impact your coworkers or your customers?  How can you impact your class-mates?

There is a way that you can make a difference in everyone’s life you come in contact with.  It may be as simple as asking questions, or maybe it consists of lending a helping hand to someone you know is in need.

Regardless of what it is, change your perspective, change your attitude and look for ways to make a difference all around you.

Those seemingly little things are not little and will lead you to making a bigger difference.

Challenge Each Other

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I have a tendency to struggle with friendships.  The reason is I don’t easily allow myself to get close to people.  It’s an issue I have that I am trying to get over. One of those things where you get hurt when you are younger and so you think the best thing is just to not care anymore.

But that’s the worst thing.  It’s taken me awhile but I am realizing the importance and value of friends.  The Bible states that iron sharpens iron, and so it should be in friendship.

Now there are definitely times when you need to cut out certain friends because they are influencing you in a way you don’t need to be influenced.

But quality friends should encourage one another, should challenge each other. Should ask the tough questions.

Even Jesus had his close 12 friends. He confided in them, challenged them, and encouraged them.

So if you are afraid like me of friendship, don’t be. Healthy friends can really help grow you as a person.