No Regrets

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It’s hard making decisions, at least important ones.  Do you make the move you’ve been thinking about?  Do you stay where you are?

Do you take a chance and go after the new job, or stay in the one you don’t really like?

Do you go back to college for the degree you’ve always wanted?

These are not easy questions, and yet we are faced with many of them throughout our lives and much more.  Often-times I think we get so stuck in our routine and what seems comfortable (even if we truly hate it), that we fail to see there are other options.

If you are unhappy in what you are doing, or really wish you could chase your dream, stop thinking about it and do it.  It’s scarier in your mind than in reality, and once you take that first step, the rest will follow, one after another.

You don’t need to see the top of the stairway to take the first step.

Breaking the Habit

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When we think of habits what usually comes to mind?  Good things or bad things?  For me the typical bad habits come to mind: workaholic, biting your fingernails, etc.

But in reality the bad habits that we have, that I have, are more subtle usually.  We don’t notice that we’ve been a little short with our friends or spouse.

We don’t see the habit of ignoring our children’s request to play with them.

The habit of over-sleeping and missing out on having your quiet time.

These are the “bad habits” that get overlooked, but need a closer look.  We need to break bad habits.  Not just talk about them.  I am preaching to myself here as well.  It’s easy to get caught up in the right and wrong game.  I think, well I don’t do this, this, or this, so I guess I’m pretty good….wrong.

I need to constantly be striving to develop good habits in every area of life, personal, family, work, and every other area.

Look for the small little habits, and break them. You can do it.

 

So Selfish!

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I am discovering something as of recently that I honestly wish wasn’t true.  I am discovering I am selfish.

I spend a lot of time thinking about myself, of thinking what bad things are going on in my life.

It’s an unhealthy and debilitating thing to be selfish.

I don’t want to be that way, but it takes work and diligence to break the chains of selfishness, because it likes to hold on and not let go and yell at you how right you are, when in reality you are wrong.

I don’t want to be selfish, but I can’t snap my fingers to make it go away, and me saying that doesn’t make it go away, it takes me deliberately choosing unselfish actions, again and again and again, until it is habit, until selfishness dies completely.

It’s a work in progress.

Missed My Monday!

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So I missed my blog post yesterday.  First time I’ve missed a day in close to 6 months.  But I had a good excuse really…

Got a chance to have a mini weekend getaway with my wife.  I suggest everyone do this on a somewhat regular basis.  Drop the kids off, and go spend the night somewhere with your wife.

Get some food you both like, have a drink and talk, real talk, reconnect.

Start planning it and quit reading this. Serious.

If You Could Do Anything?

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What is it you’ve always wanted to do?  Chances are at some point you’ve sat around with your friends, spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend and went around answering the question “if you could do anything what would it be?

It’s easy to sit in the comfort of your home in good company and laugh about the different answers to this question.  I myself have done this.  But have I done anything else with it?  Or was it just a fun conversation and nothing more.

The truth is I know what I would love to do more anything else, but I’m not doing it.  Yes I can argue I am making steps towards it which is true, but there are many steps I’m not taking.

I am extremely rationale, to a fault much of the time.  And so I immediately let thoughts like, “oh that’s just not realistic” jump in  right after I dream big.

If me or you ever wants to step into that dream life, we have to stop rationalizing and making the list of why we can’t.

We can do it, and we have to if we  expect to hit our full potential in life.

So don’t rationalize your dream away, make it happen.

Don’t Lose Your Way

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It can be easy to lose our way sometimes.  Life doesn’t have very clear road signs.  Rather than a clearly marked paved highway, life is much more like blazing out a trail in the wilderness.

There are trees that have to be cut down, rivers to be crossed, mountains to go up. And that’s just for starters.

If you’ve ever had a dream you know it’s not easy to see it fulfilled, especially if you have a busy life.  Distractions are everywhere, some of them legitimate.  But regardless of what stands in between you and your dream, stay focused.  Once you start to waver and get off track you are heading for a dangerous collision.

Your goals may not be reached by the original means you started with, there may be different detours you have to take, their may be obstacle you never imagined, but keep at it, and you will reach it.

The Four Walls

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Have you ever felt like the walls are closing in?  You sit in your apartment, house, or whatever your place of residence happens to be and feel like the walls are literally creeping in closer and closer?

We build our box and stay in it, but we find our box is boring.  We claim its safe, and keeps out the craziness of the world, but in fact, the craziness of the world isn’t all that crazy, in fact it’s much more interesting and important than many things trapped in our four walls.

Life can be overwhelmingly mundane if we allow it to be.  Between bills, work, juggling a family, college schedules, laundry, dropping kids off, picking kids up, grocery shopping, facebook notification, tweets, and whatever else vies for our attention, we find ourselves in a dizzying whirlwind of nothingness.

We look up and find ourselves wondering if we can get out of the cycle we are in.

Actually, yes you can.  It takes work, its not easy, but break out of the mold, do the difficult things, and explore, have fun, laugh.  Go explore places in your town or city you haven’t been before, go to the lake, take the kids and camp out.  Do that ‘bucket list’ now, not “someday”.

Our lives need fun.  We have many responsibilities in this life, and if we don’t balance it with periodic episodes of fun it will drive us crazy.  So go have some fun today.

Fear Is A Liar

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I really have come to believe that fear’s one goal in life is to lie  to us.  It tells us why we can’t do something, it tells us all the whys and reasons we should or shouldn’t.  And when fear is presenting all the obstacles, it does so smoothly, like a well-groomed politician, sounding sweet and true, with no weight to it.

But one thing you can always depend on when it comes to fear, is the fact that fear always lies.

Now let me clarify.  Certain fears can be good.  The kind of fear that you get when you walk down a dark street and your gut tells you to turn around and go a different more well lit route.  That’s not the kind of fear I’m talking about.

I’m talking about the hideous monster of fear that comes out when you just start to make some headway, or step out into your goals and dreams.  That fear that jumps up and makes us frozen in time so that we can’t make another step.

Fear is a great debater, it knows all your old stories to throw back in your face, it knows every time you’ve failed or haven’t tried in the past, and it throws everything it has, like a boxer in the last round who knows he has thrown less punches than his opponent.

So the next time fear creeps up, shut down its lies, and keep moving forward.

At A Loss

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Have you ever had one of those days where you seem sort of at a loss for words?  You can’t quite put your finger on it, but you feel as if some kind of hidden finger is placed on your lips to silence you.

You have things you think you want to say, but then when you try to actually formulate them, they just don’t make sense, and you wonder if it’s all just in your mind.

You are tossed  back and forth between knowing what to say, and not knowing if you should say it.

Where is the happy medium?  Where is the respect yet honesty?

How do these two coincide?

I think it’s a fine line between knowing when to talk about an issue and when you need to work it out.

I think a good rule of thumb, is asking “what is my motivation?”  If it’s for self gain or to feel better about yourself, probably better to work it out within yourself.

 

Go For It

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If there is one thing we should all do, myself included, it’s go for things more often.  How many times do I second guess myself?  Asking the what if’s and rationalizing everything.  It’s a horrible way to look at everything.

Sure there is a time and place to act and respond from a rationale point of view.  In fact much of life requires it.  But there are also circumstances where we have to take the plunge and go for it.

Life is too short to second guess everything.  There are adventure in life that we were born to partake in. Yes there is danger out there that is sometimes associated with adventure, but if we never take a risk we also will never step into the things we were meant to achieve in life.

It’s sad that we are born with innate callings, things we know we would thrive doing, but for whatever reason we don’t pursue it.  Maybe someone told us we couldn’t, maybe we don’t have faith in ourselves. But the truth is, if we don’t step out into what we know we are called to do, we will miss out on the greatest adventure of our lives.

Take the leap of faith and go for it.